What kids need

As a mother of two teenage boys, I found these words comforting, wise and timely. As they continue to push their boundaries, explore and re-invent themselves, we need to give them the space to do so safely within a loving and supportive environment. I have heard said of teenagers, they should wear a sign saying “Closed for Renovation”. Let’s give them plenty of room and time to try things out and find out who they want to be for themselves and the world around them
What kids need instead of being told what to think, is lots of information about themselves & the world around them, and the opportunity to make lots of decisions, including some less-than-wise ones. As long as their decisions are not life threatening, morally threatening, or unhealthy, let their choices be their own to grow with and learn from.
Self trust is one of the first steps toward becoming a responsible, resourceful, resilient human being… Character builds slowly, but it can be torn down with incredible swiftness. Children don’t need many no’s, any mini lectures, unnecessary questions, empty threats, ultimatums, put downs, warnings, or dictates. What they do need is support, explanations, encouragement, opportunities to be responsible, and invitations to think for themselves’.
~Barbara Colorosso